The Curious Break

It was a typical weeknight, sometime around 6:30 p.m., when my phone buzzed on the dinner table. My daughters were halfway through a silly story about the morning’s bus ride and I was only halfway tuned in. Then, a client called—again. I excused myself and beelined into my home office, once again putting someone else’s needs before my own family’s.

For sixteen years, work had a way of seeping into every corner of my life—disrupting dinners, bedtimes, even family vacations. And as a younger woman without any true responsibility outside of myself, I let it. For me, the on-call nature of client service left little time for the people I care about most. It became abundantly clear that the hustle lifestyle that I formerly thrived in was at odds with what I needed now.

At six years old, my girls have already lived more of their lives with a mom who had one foot out the door, distracted by emails, working weekends, heading out before they were awake or coming home after bedtime. That’s the version of motherhood they’ve known.

In some ways (maybe twisted), it gave me a feminist sense of pride that they thought of me as the work parent. I wanted to show them, to an extreme, that women could lead highly successful careers and reach the very top of an organization. I mean, growing up, I saw my own mom rise through the ranks to become a regional leader of a Fortune 500 insurance company. From a fairly young age, I was included in her fancy work trips where employees would seek her out to say hello and get some face time with her. I was a sponge, soaking in all of interactions and networking acumen, all while working on my professional handshake. My mom was the ultimate HBIC and I wanted so desperately to do her and my dad proud.

As I step away from Big 4, I’m not leaving my career behind, but I’m making a conscious choice to reshape it so it fits the life I want to lead, while continuing to grow professionally and pursue fulfilling opportunities. Now was it an easy decision? In some ways yes, but in a lot of ways no. My world revolved around my job good or for worse. I’m investing in myself and my family by pursuing opportunities that align with my passions, my values, and the way I want to show up in the world.

That means saying “no” to what doesn’t serve me and “yes” to what does, professionally and personally. It means creating space to be present for my daughters and for myself. I want to raise them to be kind, cognizant of the world, and capable of navigating whatever comes their way. And I know that to do that, I need to model what it looks like to fiercely pursue my passions and set boundaries.

My daughters aren’t just children I’m responsible for keeping alive, clean, and fed. They are the next generation of women, and my job is to help them navigate the world with kindness, cognizance, and competence.

I want them to be aware of the world, especially as girls who will grow into women. I want them to understand the importance of empathy, but also of strength. I want to raise girls who can think critically, be aware of the world around them, and know how to stand tall and resilient.

But I also want something simpler. I want to be fun and unafraid of sponteity and joy. I’ve spent years as the “functional parent,” ensuring they have what they need—but not necessarily what they want. It’s easy to fall into the routine of just getting things done, but now, I want to focus on laughter and enjoying the moment with them. I want to surprise them with impromptu ice cream runs, get messy with arts and crafts, and, most importantly, be present.

There’s a strange sense of liberation in walking away from a career that was once my entire identity. Now, I get to redefine what success looks like on my own terms, and it starts with realigning my family and career goals. I want to be there for my girls—wholly, completely, and with the full force of who I am. And this isn’t about stepping away from my career entirely; it’s about finding the right balance. By choosing opportunities that allow me to grow while also giving me the freedom to be the parent I want to be, I’m showing my girls that success doesn’t have to come at the cost of family, nor does family have to come at the cost of fulfilling your dreams.

This journey is just beginning, but I know that the time and energy I’m investing into my daughters will pay dividends far beyond what any client ever could. The balance I’m seeking will shape not just the woman I am, but the women my daughters will become. Because at the end of the day, they are my greatest work.